allVishal.com - India - Comments

Hi Amit, Thanks for dropping

Vishal — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 14:21:39 -0700

Hi Amit,

Thanks for dropping by. I have heard of the blog you mention and have visited it a few times. Unfortunately I don't have the energy or wit to rant so often, as evidenced by the rest of my posts :)

But hey, there's even a Stuff Indians Like! Equal opportunity put-downs, I say.

Hi Vishal, followed u from

Amit goyal — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 11:12:09 -0700

Hi Vishal,

followed u from Jai's blog. Liked your thoughts, Completely agree with u. Do read a blog Stuff white people like. Google it. Its very good and shows the hypocracy of those rich & white high society walas.

Well, food is certainly a

Vishal — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 01:01:37 -0700

Well, food is certainly a great reason to travel, and I hope you enjoy your next trip!

I have been living in

bj psychology — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 23:01:00 -0700

I have been living in Philippines for the last 20 years. Once i visited India along with my parents and the food culture there was really amazing and very diversified. Each and every state there has it's own speciality in especially in food (language cloths, and tradition would be other terms). I enjoyed many recepies their, some of them i remember Chola bhatoora, shahi paneer, matar paner i like most. If in future i will get a chance to visit India, I would not like to miss it, exclusively for Indian Food :)

WHY so MaNY cHOiceS!!

arts — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 22:31:39 -0700

oh what a dilemma !! How life gives us such tough choices !! sigh!!

:) the single color works very well giving it a dilemma feel :)

Oh noes, I FORGOT ABOUT

Maija — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 10:40:17 -0700

Oh noes, I FORGOT ABOUT COMIC KONGA! I still remembered on Saturday. ;_; I'll have to work hard to catch up before it is over!

Drive Ins

Vishal — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 00:48:46 -0700

There used to be one ancient drive in theatre in Dubai (it was even in the flight path!) but they closed it down a couple of years ago to make way for another mall. Bleh.

Glad to see true civilization is still alive somewhere. I agree about the setting being almost more fun than the movie itself. Maybe in the petrol-free future we can buy up all the old SUVs for cheap and just park them in Drive In theatres, do up the interiors in weird ways and turn the place into an even more fun evening.

You should come visit us so

Mrs. L-K — Mon, 09 Jun 2008 15:02:07 -0700

You should come visit us so we can take you to the drive-in movie theater. It's so much fun that it often doesn't matter if the movie is crap!

Rogues and Activists

Vishal — Wed, 21 May 2008 01:57:41 -0700

(for clarity I think I should point out that much of James' comment is tongue-in-cheek, so don't go laying into him. ...Much.)

Rogue? Yes. Racist? Hmm... it's only racism if you think there's a race or ethnicity superior to someone else, and I think humans have the capacity to be blithering idiots no matter where they're from.

Also, Fcking Desi's (woohoo!)

Re: Couch Activist
...is surely going to be the name of my first porn movie. Thank you.

Re: Yours, with Umbrage
You're sleeping with Dolores Umbrage?!! ...and you dare call me a rogue.

PS You're a Man-Go ha ha ha ha

This 'V' person is a right bloody racist, what?

Malcomus James Khuadros, Esquire — Wed, 21 May 2008 00:13:03 -0700

You sir, are a rogue, and a racist! How DARE you scoff at the very real threat of black negroes pursuing ladies, with sinister intent? Just because negroes of other colors have been hunted to extinction, is no reason to say Nay! to the witch-hunt and pitchfork mob.

I for one am offended and shocked, SHOCKED I SAY, by your effrontery.

Couch activist indeed.

Yours, with umbrage,

Malcomus James
(Parallel parking universe, Lot A-39)

My Horde is Browner than Yours

Vishal — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 15:53:29 -0700

Re: Merch
There definitely a market (and worryingly, of both the ironic comedy and deathly serious varieties), but most countries would not take well to the, um, 'eloquence' of the term. Copulating Desis, perhaps?

Re: Indian Food
Trust me, you would have remembered Kori Rotti. I too am of the cooking school Where Recipes Have No Names (it's the next Spanish Molecular Cuisine, I tell you! Ferran Adria is quaking as we speak), but once in a while I can toss together a named dish. Of course, I'm seriously considering re-engineering Kori Rotti for several reasons, so any dish I come up with will be prefixed with "Vishal's Needlessly Complicated..."

As for the rest: Chicken Tikka Masala was invented in Scotland when someone asked for "Gravy!" and all they had was some cream and canned tomato soup; it's the most democratic, individual Indian dish the 20th century has produced. And Chilli Murgh is supposed to have several incarnations; I've been to restaurants where ordering 'Chilli Chicken' and 'Chicken Chilli' from the same place nets entirely different (all spicy) results.

My Chickpeas Korma is a devolved and evolved from a recipe that originally called for chickpeas patties in a biryani. Making the patties is too much work, so now I just make chickpeas in a spinach and cream gravy (it's mild, low on chillies but high on aromatic spices like nutmeg and cardamom); then, layer it with nearly cooked basmati rice, seal it up and let it do its magic on an ultra-low flame. Massively satisfying (and fatty), and makes a nice counterpoint when served opposite a fiery red mutton biryani.

But Dude, I so want some Aloo Rakshasa now.

Re: Bollywood
"Does Bollywood really have a market for pasty, chubby white guys with dodgy fashion sense dancing badly?"

...are you kidding? That's all we have! And while Bollywood proper might be in the throes of fake-tan-six-pack-itis, us South Indians are always connoisseurs of the Jelly Belly.

Re: 300
Believe it or not... I haven't seen it yet. It's sitting there, but I'm waiting for the right mood, which has yet to present itself. Since I wasn't a fan of the book I'm not expecting much, but the five minutes I did see were actually better than the source material, so I'm looking forward to it. It's gotta be better than Beowulf, right?

...right?

Hold Back the Kohl-Eyed Horde (and pass the naan)

dan l-k — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 12:41:36 -0700

I'd wager something substantial that there's a market out there for "Fcking Desi" gear. Hell, I'd wear it myself if it didn't make me look like a racist twit to do so.

I have not had the pleasure of Kori Roti, no (that I know of, anyway. Some of the Indian buffets I've been to have had helpful and informative signage like "Potatoes in Yoghurt Sauce - Not Dessert"), but understand that if you're making dishes with actual names and duplicatable recipes you're already ahead of me. My kitchen tends to turn out things like Practically Chicken Tikka Masala, Very Nearly Chickpeas Korma, the several incarnations of Chili Murgh, and, on one memorable occasion, Aloo Rakshasa.

Does Bollywood really have a market for pasty, chubby white guys with dodgy fashion sense dancing badly? If so, I'm totally there; it beats going back to the register mines.

Oh, you say there's division among the melanin-enhanced, but I know well enough it'll only last until the time comes for the Big Invasion and you all band together for the higher purpose of Taking White People's Stuff. You can't fool me, man; I've seen 300. Coupla times, even. (A movie I adore, in spite of the several sensible and well-reasoned arguments not to, if for nothing else for slipping at least one moment of "OMG they put the slash right there on the screen" past, apparently, nearly everyone.)

Illumination

Vishal — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 01:07:43 -0700

Hey, wasn't this post about light-bulbs?

When Brown People Attack!

Vishal — Tue, 01 Apr 2008 00:51:06 -0700

Re: El Rant-o Anonymous-o
It was like listening to an electro version of the 1812 overture, only nowhere as awesome as that should sound. Part of the reason I published it was that it was probably the largest single word-count of anything the person has ever written, even if it was highly derivative(thanks for the ML link), and I didn't want to lose someone's magnum opus to the ether.

Reason #3: "Fcking Desi's" T-Shirts and other merchandise. He/she didn't leave their name, so I can claim ownership. Or rig the MySQL database in the backend to make it look like I did it (in jest). Show me the money!

Re: Cohabitation
I would love to come over and cook my crappy curry. You've never had Kori Rotti, have you? (Okay, so I don't know to make it, but experimentation is good for the soul, I hear).

All this is based on the assumption that the dollar is not going to melt down (people keep screaming at me that it is, and this is somehow IMPORTANT, but damned if that's going to make me pick up a newspaper). It's quite possible that you might need to come over here. We don't have as good unemployment benefits or forward-thinking marriage and sex law, though, so we'd be living in shame and secret (oh the drama!). I'd trot you out to Marine Drive every morning where you'd be picked up by Bollywood scouts for Rs.500 a day as background scenery in songs set in clubs (polish your grinding skills).

Re: Brown People, Homogeneous Horde
As entropy increases with time, so too does the splitting and differentiation of brown people, or so my half-Madhava-Brahmin-half-Mangalorean-Poojary-Bombay-now-Mumbai-born-Gulf-raised-NRI-westernised-easternised- not-really-religious-but-yes-hindu-oh-those-silly-bunts-and-others-self tells me.

You have much to learn, paleface.

Comment Moderation

Vishal — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 23:56:32 -0700

I haven't turned on comment moderation, and so this was already published when I saw it. I did debate for a second or two about just getting rid of it, but only because some of the inflammatory language might show up as hate speech in some search engine. I wouldn't want my site to suffer because of that.

So I gave it a long, hard think (30 seconds) and realised that someone with my views is bound to piss off people(of every persuasion), that this was just the first of perhaps many shrill voices, and I'd better decide on how to deal with them right here and now.

I chose comedy, as always.